If you need a lot more joy in your life, come and live here. When I am happy, I enjoy it at most when I find the presence of mind to back away from wherever I am and whatever I am doing at that moment, and be able to just enjoy it. It exists and I am lucky to be a part of it. I cannot articulate the practice of joy better than R. S. Thomas ("The Bright Field").I have seen the sun break throughto illuminate a small fieldfor a while, and gone my wayand forgotten it.
Like a moment when a Swallowtail butterfly alights upon you, or a bird comes right up close to take a look at you, that sudden, thrilling moment of connectedness with everything- with ALL life- and beyond. As a New Zealander, getting a bit fucked up in nature brings me a huge amount of joy. As has happened so many times, your question finds me at the exact right moment. I was going about my morning routine today, and wondering why I 2nd hand louis vuitton wallet melbourne am so often such a joyless bastard.
As I was riding my bike there, in the shade of the big trees, in different shades of green, in the fresh air, for the first time in so long, I felt a real physical joy of existence. I find joy in my studio, a sanctuary where I can quieten down and think. While I work with my hands, the labour intensive artmaking, drives the stream of consciousness. Too many thoughts to remember, breaching the retaining walls. Speeding, ungraspable, rushing by.
My first response, to your question about where I find joy, was that I find joy in being in nature (I live in a small city so it involves a bit of planning) or in playing with scissors and glue (I enjoy creating collages). I thought deeper and realized that I find the most joy in being present in the moment. You can be present in a room without being present in the moment. When truly present and paying attention to place, people and projects, the joy in being alive comes forward and creates a spark. I find joy in culture, sometimes, making art, or singing a songi've never heard before.
It includes choosing to participate in communal activities that are life giving. It includes celebrating other people’s joy. Joy is so much richer when shared with another or others.Yes, joy often can seem elusive and difficult to feel. I am pretty sure though that joy, like love, is all around us, even when we don’t feel it or are not being attentive to it. Thus, even in the darkest times I make the effort to seek joy. Even if sometimes it is a struggle.
Joy to me is essentially an outlook, or at least a product of optimism. In my experience the occasions that are joyful, whether big events or small, all require that basic belief that things will be alright, that good times are ahead.Sometimes we are in the maelstrom and this is impossible, and the door is closed to joy. If we are fortunate enough for the stress to retreat though, and the clouds to part, then joy is the release – the song we sing along to, the coffee and biscuit we sit and enjoy, the friend we hug, the walk through the park, the child we play with. Joy is the release, and the belief (however short-lived) that we are on the path to better things. Where I Find My Joy To find joy I need to find connection To find connection I need to seek connection This isnt always quick or easy, as not everyone wants to connect with me andnot all people, are my people.
And they also help us to understand that loss is a natural part of life, and that there is nobody or nothing in particular to blame for loss, and that the way to get through these difficult times is to rage, and to mourn, and to accept, and to embrace life. Constantly during these past years we have been ground down by loss, and forgotten what joy is. The day begins with the remembering of tragedy, the first thought on waking is of our son, the final thought before sleep, and many days he fills the seconds and minutes and hours in between too. Except when we are distracted by the necessities of survival. Which sometimes offers glimpses of how he was before, and which gives hope, yes, but scrapes at the scar tissues and reopens the emotional wounds. It will be a life's journey, for him, for us.But.
I dampen down the will to procreate excessively with visualisations and meditation. I gain great joy continually and every day running the grand trick on my body and look forward to subtly different tricks I will play to lead a calmer, less destructive and carnal life. I also enjoy the arts where they do not deny our darker natures, and celebrate our wins and losses, such as the many works of one N.Cave. I find joy in the small things in life. Once I thought joy would be found in life’s many accomplishments. But after the end of a 17 year marriage, career change, finding love (after believing it no longer existed), I become content in my place in life.
Now she has a child of her own- and what brings me joy, is knowing she will grow up in a home where music is played loud and it will also become her constant companion to look after her when we are long gone . What I’ve learned about joy is that it shows up. It shows up as a gift, a surprise.
The scales are not balanced between us humans and that sucks. I do the silly thing therapists and gurus remind us to do on a regular basis and write down, draw or paint about the things I am grateful for. It's an ongoing practice, I forget about it sometimes. But when I get knocked off the "healthy horse" and my head gets overwhelmed and my sleep gets shittier...
Over the last two and a half years or so, my partner and I faced a series of crises and personal losses that left both of our respective new therapists slack jawed. Most of the details are not for sharing, but I sit here six months into mourning over my father's death. Life put us through the wringer, and somehow it made my marriage stronger.
You see, this seems like a scientific method for finding joy, and perhaps irrelevant to the question, because of course joy can’t be equated to a soccer cleat, or the missing setlist. When you say simple joys escape you, perhaps these are just not things that you have envisioned as a source? And if you delve into the “simplicity” maybe it’s not that simple at all. Perhaps that which we seek for joy becomes too complex to possibly exist. A pure relief from sorrow, and grief. Maybe we can start to envision joy in the obtainable.
Ecstasy and joy.The part that still holds onto your name is still out there, hoping to get picked, to be judged favorably, perhaps unjustly accused. To be affirmed.But the seed will be there even when roaches have become extinct. A vast hard to discern part of me is sure of it.
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